No family is perfect:
All sociological surveys, psychological studies, criminal records clearly point out at two messages:
1 Children from divorced families are more prone to become delinquents, and create social problems.
2 . Even amidst defects, couple who live together for longer time, experience
better happiness than the divorced couple.
No doubt there are certain exceptions to these statements, but, as one author put it, 'exceptions confirm generalisations'.
In western countries divorce is more common and an accepted behaviour.The simple excuse in most cases is 'We couldn't reach an understanding.'That, inspite of dating,acquintance for conciderable period, etc.
But , it is better if one thing is remembered-'understanding ' is always a relative term.It is never complete. Even in long living couples, 'understanding' often keeps expanding its horizon.
WHAT IS 'UNDERSTANDING?'
The frequently mentioned concept 'understanding' is nothing but the depth of the knowledge of the attitudes of the partner- to be brief.It needs tolerence, keenness, sympathy, similar wavelength, and such other factors to fill to the brim.Whenever these things are lacking, coupled with hastiness,egoism etc, 'understanding' remains ununderstood.! And tha'swhen our young couple start thinkingthat they 'can not pull on together'.And, that's where they exactly fail.
DIVORCE-WHEN?
It is not the argument here that every marriage can be saved anddivorce is an hasty act. Only purpose here is to make breaking families to stop and look back calmly and see whether they are not proceeding towords seperation for repairable reasons.Every couple , when they are thinking of seperation, says-'we have thought all that. The gap between us is too big ti repair'.But if they sustain with patience, just after passage of some time,thwhen they cool down, they may laugh at their earlier thought.Such casers have happened in many families.understanding,perfect family, seperation,suspicion
Divorce may be inevitable in some cases like-
1. One of the partner is a serious addict to drugs/alchohal/gambling etc, and doesn't agree for counselling,and such other remedies.
2 Too lazy and doesn't take any responsibility,but forces wife to pay for his own expences.
3 . Gives physical torture to his spouse.
Apart from such cases, divorce for just, 'tastes differ',or, 'our interests won't agree' ,etc do not contribute for a better future.In South Asian countries, according to some reports, most happy couple who lived together for as long according to some reports, most happy couple who lived together for as long as 40-50 years, are reported to have confessed that their interets agree to only 50-60 percent.
REASONS FOR DEVELOPING A SPLIT
Large number of divorces in recent decades in advanced countries take place for reasons whinch could be repaired.When cases are carefully examined, we find the root of split lies in one or more of the following reasons-
1 The feeling in one partner that the other person is not hearing to his/her opinions.
2 One of the partners always insulting /suspecting the other
3 Sexual dissatisfaction
4 Igoistic behaviour of both or any one etc
If we calmly look at these causes it will be very clear that none of these areirrepairable
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